Absolutely Nothing

It was quite dark outside with only the traffic noise from the 'Aoyama dori' to let me know there was still a human world outside. A pale moon hung in the sky like a paper lantern, the passing thin veil of clouds rolling past the luminescence adding to the flickering flame effect. Gone is 'Chup-Kamuy' so as not to witness the night-time debauchery because she exchanged places with her brother. There is no debauchery close by me on this night that I lay on my bed trying to read my book and my eyes resting in the darkness outside. The reflection of my bedroom on the windows stared back at me. This is the time I like best, it's a quiet time, a time for me, a sanctuary where the balance of the hour helps me to think and the fatigue behind my eyes helps me to dream. Here in these still moments they combine and the two sides of reality come together and blend. I see the sea and what's reflected upon it yet I cannot distinguish between the two, where does one end and the other begin?
I shouldn't worry over this matter.
A girl's dream...
My heart is aching and I’ve never felt this bad, I pinch myself to check that all of this is real. I keep thinking but I’m not letting on, I feel this sad and then you’ve got the cheek to ask me how I feel.
Absolutely nothing!
She's been away this week working, curiously enough on a project that would have halos and horns co-existing in the eye of the cameras. I have done a little more editing and helping out at the restaurant and I feel quite unproductive at times.
The book could not hold my attention. It was a dismal choice amongst the five or six that I pick up at a time. Despite the 'unputdownable' claim in all the hype about this book, it could not hold my attention. I often drop into Kinokuniya, the second-hand bookstore in Shinjuku. Here I can find some amazing bargains and get books in English too. My present reading of 'The Accidental Billionaires' by Ben Mezrich is just too painful. The movie that was based on it, 'Social network', was much better and much more palatable and I sat through it thinking how interesting and how lovely Brenda Song looks despite having the dour role of the gold-digger girlfriend, a role she played well in fact.
The book fell over the edge at about the same time as I did.

Somewhere past the usual sitting for breakfast my eyes opened to a perfectly blue sky framed in my window. It's the sort of sky you want to run under and breathing it all in deeply you'd know that your lungs would be painted with the same hue. Somewhere during the course of my getting showered and ready to go out, that book jumped up from the floor next to my bed and found itself in the waste bin. Hey, some of you may like it but this is just my little story saying that I did not.
Somewhere within the week's absence of Hitomi and inside our phone calls and texts came the knowledge that we each have a special feeling. It's a once in a lifetime feeling and for anyone who finds it more than once I would consider them extremely lucky indeed. It is like the flame that dances on the candle, it lights our way and we cherish and nurture such a brightness that holds back the dark. Once it's gone, it is gone and emptier we are for its loss.

I sat in a pasta and salad bar in Tokyo station while waiting for her. Having missed breakfast it was nice to catch an early lunch at eleven. It's interesting to see all the salary-men enjoy lunch here. One stands outside the window and leans forward to kiss his girlfriend, bodies held back at an acceptable social distance. Some sitting in animated conversations lit up by the light of lap-top screens. More men in suits and ties were discussing diagrams hastily drawn out on notepaper. Ideas that could earn a company a fortune are discussed over spaghetti and salad.

She arrived as I was drinking the last of my coffee. I saw her though the window. She wore a simple plain white cotton dress and carried a white woolen over her arm. She had a silver brooch as her one simple adornment and yet the way she moved you'd swear it was the world's most expensive dress.

Candles!
I wiped my mouth and strolled out to meet her as she waited for me by the information bureau.
One hug and kiss and then looking deeply into my eyes she says, "I am starving, let's go eat!"