In the dark

Sometimes there are a whole host of feelings that are lost behind words that we can never find. Despite our extensive vocabularies, our eloquence and a little poetic license, we find that sometimes we just stagger around in the darkness of confusion, bumping into things.
My eldest brother, Tokutaro decided that it was a good time to phone me. I have spoken before about him and the lapses between him and his brothers and sister (me) regarding communication is inconsistent. Admittedly it has improved since we spoke face to face last year and the last time that we spoke was sadly almost three months ago. I know, I could have phoned him earlier and I was planning to after this weekend, honestly!
He phoned my number and got my answer machine. No one likes talking to answer machines right? I detest having to do it. He then phoned Hiro, my brother next door and I was around there having tea, so he did manage to talk with me after all. After we spoke of the niceties, the news and other small talk a shock is what he had for us. Here is the news - our Father is dating a regular Lady now!
I know we all need someone and it was a few years after my beloved Mother passed before Dad even took the company of a Lady and perhaps it is only right. Even at his age he should not be alone.
I dare not ask him directly about her because it really isn't my place but I cannot help but be more than a little curious.
I think I may journey north soon!

The other day we had news that Riko, my esteemed colleague at the office, is moving across to a sister publication. She will be missed. How long she coveted my desk by the window is anyone's guess but after I thought that I'd resign for health reasons, I said that she could have it. The very next day I was given my job back but I still moved desk so she could have my desk by the window. I remember such a wonderful smile on her face that day. We have worked well together and I hope one day we will again. She can compliment any team with her insight and knowledge. It has been a privilege for me to work with her and to be her friend. She is lovely and I wished her well with a small token of my affection and respect for her.
Later that day, I was also asked to step into the boss's office.
He was nice and we talked of generalities and he quickly looked over some of my past articles and he even mentioned that I looked good in last months VIP magazine which elicited a small appreciative smile from me.
Then came the crunch!
There is a massive reshuffle going on inside the company and he no longer feels that my talents are best utilized in my current position. Would I be willing to re-locate to the office complex around the corner and into 'Classy?' He went on to say that my approach to writing just may be the spark they need over there to inject a little more dynamism into a new team they are assembling.
My heart sank!
The compliment was nice and perhaps expected when the boss wants something but I must have looked dreadful and I know there was a tear in my eye.
He must have been looking for my body language and facial expressions.
"Your style would also blend well into the jisin" he quickly added.
I told him that if he thinks I'm best suited over there then I will go there and do the best that I can but I would be extremely disappointed to leave "JJ" because that is where my heart lies.
Between you and I, I don't think my talents are suited with Classy at all but if I had to move and if the choice would be mine then I would choose jisin. It has a huge readership and its presentation isn't too far removed from what I've come to love from JJ.
Then it came, the inevitable carrot on the stick! At least I wasn't being bullied or forced it seemed, not yet anyway.
"There would be a salary increase in either position." he smiled reassuringly.
I nodded and I asked if I may speak frankly to which he agreed as he leaned back into his soft leather chair.
I said if it be the directive that I am to move sideways into one of our sister publications then I would do it and it need not be said that I'd continue to offer my best work but if the choice were my own then I would prefer to stay where I am as a part of an excellent team with a successful format that has seen an increase in circulation over the last couple of years.
There are two things to note in that statement. The use of the word 'sideways' was my little way of hinting that I would be much more interested and amenable if there was a promotion on the table and 'increase in circulation over the last couple of years!' Hello, that's exactly how long I've been a part of the team!
He looked at me for a long while before he started nodding and pursed his lips.
He said that he'd leave things as they are for now but it would be reviewed again in a few months.
With relief, I smiled and I thanked him.
As I headed down to my little office, I again wondered just how much of a gamble is going full time with the agency?
Talking of which, I have a massive promotion over the weekend for a car accessories company. Those last shoots may well have been worth it.