A canal runs through it.

Warm summer days embrace me and as the old adage would suggest, these are the times when a young girls mind turns to...
... An empty chair and her side of the bed that remains empty. The seasons suddenly seem accelerated.
Otaru used to have a massive waterway canal feeding the towns industries but now what remains is purely decorative. Canals suddenly seem important!

I finally made it here to Dad's house on Sunday evening because something important came up on Saturday and that affected my travel plans.
Dad and the girls and I had a wonderful dinner together and then I sat alone with Father in his study. It all sounds so wonderfully exuberant doesn't it?
It was a utility room and a laundry room in its history but since Momma's passing, Dad turned it into an office where he could work from home and then as he relinquished more and more to Tokutaro, my eldest brother who lives a few kilometers away in Sapporo, the office became more of his study.

Dad and I had a very open and honest chat about things and all it seemed I wanted to do was to make him see his strength in me, his blood passed into me and then he did something very unexpected. He just stood and held me in his arms and I just cried. I couldn't help it.
He never told me I was silly which is how I would have predicted a response from him. All I can say about that is what he said to me was warm and wonderful and words that I waited so long to hear out loud. They were also comforting and made me feel good about myself again.
Enough silliness!

This morning I walked out towards the lighthouse and spent some time with my 'sisters' just looking out at the fishing boats and the ferries and for some reason being by the ocean or in this instance, Ishikari Bay, always calms me. I must invest in one of those relaxation C.D.'s that has sounds of the ocean and whale song as tracks.

I do feel better and I was going to write about such concepts as acceptance and the delicate balancing acts between knowledge and ignorance but none of this matters to me at this moment in time. I do have new plans for the future that have to be flexible in the extreme and of course each and every one of them will be subject to change at a moments notice.

I had a mail from a friend who was concerned about the current trend of my 'blogging style' and in replying to him it made me think about it too but unfortunately it's harder for me to see when I'm the one inside the specimen bottle.
This has caused me concern though and I thought that if this person sees it will others? Without using the person's name, because I don't have their permission, I want to make public my reply to perhaps offer a general calming of the situation.

Hiya ********** It is kind that you offer me a thought in this manner, thank you very much. From my own point of view it seems like a natural progression. Of course to compare my last entry with this time last year might present an obvious change but such is the nature of change over periods of time that I think my view seems correct. Then again since you seemed moved to write to me and mention it I must consider that your view is quite a valid one. All hail the distant and casual observers in the audience for they see a different picture than those up on the stage reading aloud their lines. Apologies for my metaphors, even they seem dipped in cynicism these days and I would never intentionally mean to insult you. The truth dear friend is that the elements of life, such as it is, can have everything from momentary to momentous and sometimes something so momentous can come along to make you change. Does that make sense? It does to me so you must see it too. Some truths you accept Some truths you confront Some truths you reject Some truths you don't want to be true but it does not stop them being so. Some truths are lies and the majority of the public want to accept it. Truth has a unique structure that can change its shape depending on the angle of your point of view. Please keep your stars twinkling in my sky because I love to look upon them and make wishes and smile at my own insignificance in the vastness of all things. Please don't worry. I have said that my blog is sometimes my own therapy. Self expression takes many forms. Thank you for your mail to me. Respectfully Tomomi

Thanks for all the messages everyone has sent by various means - it appears that several of you want comments back.
So by popular request - I officially re-open comments.
Do with it what you will and say what you want.